Being outside of the hierarchy is probably the no1 key trait of a Sigma Male. But what does being outside of the hierarchy actually mean? What does it look like?
Let’s delve into it a little more here.
Introduction : The beginnings of the independence mindset.
I recall once during my IT contracting career that I was taken into my bosses office and told bluntly that I’d made a faux pas and was warned. Remember, when you’re a contractor you are required to hit the ground running, and you’re not given the ridiculous amount of leeway that most modern non jobs allow (I’m talking about verbal warnings, written warnings, redundancy etc). Not to mention that quite a few modern jobs are not really jobs at all..There is not much productive work being done, and you can “hide” within the organisation if it’s large enough.
I was warned for speaking my mind at a works event to a particularly old , bitter and rather ugly hag who we occasionally had to deal with. She was having a go at me (I also found out behind my back), so on one occasion my short temper got the better of me and I said “look, we all know what your problem is…You’re an ugly old woman and no guy wants to fuck you, and you don’t have kids. But that’s your mistake, don’t take it out on the rest of us”
Now the feedback I got (not from my boss, from other guys I worked with) was that I am actually “cool” and say what other people are actually thinking. But, it was generally not advisable (I am surprised I got away with it and was not fired, to be honest).
This wasn’t the first instance of this kind of thing. I recall these exact phrases from my report card :
“Steve could be very good at anything if he would apply himself more consistently”
“Outstanding athlete when he makes the effort”
“Very bright but has issues with authority and is prone to outbursts of foul language”. (This last one earned a whack around the face from my father (he called it a “short sharp shock”. (Incidentally it was even more of a surprise because I had epilepsy as a child, so my father never hit me in the face / head area on medical grounds).
Mistrust And Contempt For Weak Authority
The point of these anecdotes is to illustrate the beginnings of a Sigma Mindset. I guess underlying it is a questioning mindset (recall in my other videos I mentioned intellectual curiosity), and the beginnings of an anti authority attitude “issues with authority and prone to outbursts of foul language”.
Now at age 43, I recognise the fledgling man that I would one day become in the child that I was. So how does this translate to removing yourself from the hierarchy?
Well, not much has changed since I was a child and I distrust authority even more nowadays, and with good reason. I think it’s becoming increasingly clear to anyone with eyes that wants to see that we are being ruled by people who perhaps do not have our best interests at heart. When you compare the great leaders of yesteryear with those of today, you cannot help but feel they are objectively inferior, and we are being short changed in every important sense.
Now this mistrust of authority that used to be expressed by “outbursts of foul language” and (probably) a surly teenage attitude has changed into a mature mans practical , goal oriented reaction of : what can I do to get away from being ruled over by these low quality people who are not on my side? How can I take their power over me away from them, within the legal framework and within the law?
Removing Yourself From All Hierarchies : Social, Sexual, Governmental
Not only that, but how to insulate myself as far as possible from anyone having power over me , at any time?
Going further, how to structure my life so I can do what I want when I want? How can I build it so that I only talk to people who I want to talk to – those I respect and like?
How can I meet women simply, easily, when I want and without having to participate in all the bullshit games that most men get drawn into? How can I meet women who love me for ME, just myself and my personal characteristics. Nothing to do with status, a fancy job, or my social standing ? I view it all as complete bullshit.
That has been my life’s work.
I’ve touched upon how I set about doing this in my related video “Sigma Male : Outside The Hierarchy”, and explained in great detail the mindset and action plans to achieve this for yourself in Primal Seduction and my video product Secret Society. I’ve given you this long introduction to point out how it began for me, so that you might recognise these qualities in yourself and have a starting point. Now it’s time to answer my original 2 questions:
What does being outside of the hierarchy actually mean? What does it look like?
Life Outside Of The Hierarchy
Financial Independence
Being outside of the hierarchy boils down to wrestling the locus of control away from other parties and returning it to your own hands. Specifically:
Building your own income streams – as I have done and continue to grow with enthusiasm and rigour. It stems from an independence mindset, as I’ve clumsily painted here with the introduction to this video.
Now if you want another example aside from mine, think about Owen Benjamin and Vox Day’s partnership. I’ve recently started watching Owen Benjamin and Vox, and I like them both a great deal. Owen recently spent a month talking at great length (sometimes with 4 hour long streams) about various controversial subjects that I will not mouth here (I’m not going to intentionally attract trouble).
After a couple of months, his channel was demonetised. Not only ads taken away, but all of the money from voluntary contributions from his real fanbase (these contributions were made in the form of Superchats).
To be clear : these were normal people who decided they liked so much what Owen was saying that they sent him voluntary donations on his live streams.
Youtube refunded them all over a 2 month period – and we’re not talking a small amount of money here either. ]
So what did he and Vox do? They didn’t whine , they instead built their own platform where fans can make these voluntary contributions (it’s called Unauthorized.TV by the way). As far as I know, they have got back about 50% of those contributions in the first few days of go live. Outstanding achievement.
I’ve quoted this example to you because this is an example of a practical, level headed and highly intelligent response and graphically shows how to wrestle control back for yourself. (I also admire it, and should probably take similar actions incase the worst should happen to my channel – though I think it’s unlikely).
I guarantee you that these guys would rankle at the thought of anyone having any power over them, as I do – and they’ve put their money where their mouth is and done something about it.
That’s part one of removing yourself from the hierarchy.
Daily Life And Meeting Women Outside The Hierarchy
Let’s address some more. What about your daily timetable? What about meeting women how you want, without having to engage in the games that other men have to engage with?
I’ll need to talk about my own life, mindset and philosophy here. Please don’t interpret it as a brag – it’s not. I’m trying to show you what being outside the hierarchy actually MEANS, and what it looks like.
So, I get up when I want (usually about 6 or 7 am – I have never needed to sleep much – maybe 4-6 hours per night and I love mornings). I read a few websites, get morning coffee then write my first post of the day (currently for my other website).
I then hit the gym , taking both phones with me. Phone 1 is to note down any thoughts that occur to me , for my new product , or for a YT video, as I walk around.
Now the idea of taking out the 2nd phone to the gym and later during my daily walkabouts is to voice record any little insights I have that can serve as a blog post and YT video. I usually type out a script for the YT videos, but sometimes if the idea hits me fully formed, I just speak it out into the phone and then upload later that day.
The rest of my time during the day is spent with productive work, walking around noting down my thoughts and occasionally chatting up women. Of an evening, I go out on a date, see a girl I am seeing or watch a movie.
Rejoining The Hierarchy On YOUR Terms
I’ve recently compiled a spreadsheet where I note down timings to structure my day to maximise productivity. This year will be the year I settle in one place after 6 years of wandering the globe…So I am beginning to plan out how I will settle into a routine. Alongside the daily plan, I’ve also got plans to join in gym classes , firstly because I enjoy getting fit, and secondly as another way to meet girls who match what I like (young, in shape, take care of themselves, high self esteem). THere’s no point just slavishly following the scriptures of daygame and having to prowl the streets to meet women.
The point of talking about this is that I do these things on my terms and have structured my life as I want it. Secondly, note that it’s easy for a successful Sigma to enter a group if he wants to. Remember, Sigmas take themselves out of the hierarchy BY CHOICE – they are NOT rejects who no one wants to spend time with. This is a key point. It’s also worth noting that Sigmas do get approached to lead and are often mistaken for Alphas. I recall that often in a group setting, if no leader was available people would often look to me to provide direction. This is known as a situational alpha.
Now think about meeting women. Remember that I’ve developed a method over many many years which involves approaching girls where you think you’ve got a good chance of success…But being foreceful in CREATING these opportunities by forcing IOIS proactively. Moreover, you have to learn how to make a quick strong good impression in a girls mind that excites her and makes her want to see you again.
All of this without ever offering any money , social status or membership of a group. It’s about being able to approach a girl and get her based simply on the force of your personality and charisma. It is not easy.
Now if you’re smart enough to read between the lines, you’ll realise that at age 43 I am tweaking my life somewhat and either late this year or certainly early next year will settle in one place. This still fits well within the Sigma framework because note I will be doing this on my terms. Making the effort to join groups such as fitness classes , pool classes (I am very keen on pool and am actually pretty good at it too) and possibly martial arts classes is the first sign however that I’m going to pull myself back into the fold and rejoin the hierarchy…but only loosely.
As a Sigma you only want to be part of the hierarchy if it benefits you…And you pick and choose which hierarchy you choose to align with to make sure the potential for harm to yourself is minimised. There’s a reason I am choosing to stay in Poland instead of the UK. I’m not going to spell it out, but it should be obvious that I am choosing a different hierarchy to join rather than the one I was simply born into.