I decided to carry out a simple hypergamy experiment, to attempt to uncover the truth about Hypergamy. Is it real? After all, If you take a tour for an hour or two on so called red pill Youtube channels, or some of the more well known manosphere sites, you’d be forgiven for thinking that women are treacherous, fickle creatures, who always monkey branch : constantly on the lookout for the best possible man.
Furthermore, you might also hear that women nowadays have unrealistic standards. They want a man over 6″3, with a nine inch penis, a high status job and a bank balance in the millions. The average guy simply will never get a look in.
Whole Youtube channels and movements have sprung up around this central concept, including the Black Pill, and the Looks Money Status camp. Whatever their message, I’ve experienced the enervating effect it can have on men – particularly young men. I’ve trained men in real life who wasted several years of their lives due to excessive Black Pill thinking. So this isn’t just a mindwank exercise. It has real world repurcussions for real people.
The Hypergamy experiment
The experiment was very simple. I walked around Warsaw, in Poland, for about an hour , from 5:30 PM to 6:30 PM on Tuesday, August 13, 2019. I attempted to capture a representative sample of male and female couples, to deduce 3 factors:
(i) Was there a large disparity between their looks levels? If Hypergamy is real, surely the majority of men would be much better looking than the women.
(ii) Did it appear that the man was always much higher status than the woman? Putting looks to one side, the other argument for Hypergamy is that women (particuarly young women at the peak of their SMV) will gravitate towards high status men with resources and status. Is this true?
(iii) It’s very hard to measure objectively of course, but did these couples actually seem HAPPY? Did there appear to be a balance? I cannot measure this with a scientific instrument, but bear in mind I’ve studied social dynamics for years, trained hundreds of men to get the best possible women they can, have writen 2 books, and have successfully seduced several hundred women , a large proportion of whom were high SMV.
I tell you this just to say that I can usually “read” people pretty accurately and , as well as get a sense of where they stand on the socio sexual totem pole.
Hypergamy Experiment Caveat:
FOr this hypergamy experiment I can hear the naysayers already:
You filmed in Warsaw. Try it in London, or New York.
A vaild point. It does bring up the other questions of what draws influence on Hypergamy ? I’ll cover this later on , so keep watching. Bottom line : although there is SOME influence, the natural human instinct is strong, and I’d venture a guess I could carry out the same experiment in London, Rio De Janeiro, Los Angeles or wherever, and the result would be the same.
The other point I would make is that Poland is unquestionably a functioning, healthy society. It does not suffer from the same ills that face countries like the USA, the UK, and to an extent China. The politicians care about the local populace, and there is a sense of camaraderie amongst people, that they feel part of a greater whole. When you walk around Poland, you cannot help but feel that it follows the natural order of things. The results you will see reflect that.
The Hypergamy Experiment Results:
The vast majority of couples I saw were closed to looks matched, at least from my perspective. I attempted to be as objective as possible. Here are some samples with the match or mismatch rating. Was I correct? You be the judge.
I’d draw attention to the fact that the looks matched couples are often also close to age matched. Young girls in the prime of their SMV are matched with guys roughly the same age. As I mentioned before, this is a sign of a healthy functioning society. I’d be willing to bet in years to come these couples are still together and happily producing babies.
According to the experts in the manosphere and on red pill Youtube channels, you would see these prime young women with higher status men rather than these normal young men. We begin to see the unravelling of the Hypergamy narrative.
On another video I talked about the divorce rate in various countries around the world. Please note that the oft touted figure of 50% of divorces ending in marriages is cherry picked data designed to reinforce their narrative. If you adjust for religion, ethnicity, education level and age, you find that the percentage almost halves. Look it up for yourselves if you want to see that data. From recollection, the lowest probabilty of divorce is to marry a Christian, college educated Asian women.
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The hypergamy experiment conclusion
I do not agree with the manosphere, red pill, black pill luminaries that hypergamy is as rampant as they advocate. I think that there are a number of factors at play here:
1: The theorists themselves
I question the real world experience of these self appointed experts. I’ve learned over the years to quickly size up a guy and his previous experience with women, and the majority of them do not strike me as confident , self assured men who are or ever have been successful with women. I suspect their objectivity is coloured by their worldview and their insecurity about their position in the sexual marketplace. Fundamentally, I suspect they do not trust or generally love women.
Because a lot of these guys are highly intelligent, they construct a narrative and worldview which sounds convincing and is catnip to the legions of bitter, “black pilled” men who lap up this corrosive narrative.
There is a large market for so called “red pill / black pill” knowledge. It gives a certain kind of guy a feeling of satisfaction and perhaps superiority to thumb their noses at normal men, because they have access to these higher truths that “normies” are not part of. It’s attractive to them to feel part of a group with superior knowledge that allows them to sit in judgement over the majority of the population, like the young men I have shown here, who are quietly going about their lives and are observably happy in doing so.
The other bracket of theorists are guys who have gone out in the real world and attemtped to fornicate in great numbers with young attractive women and largely been unsuccessful. Rather than look in the mirror, they instead construct a narrative that female nature is to blame.
Overall : be sceptical about who you listen to. Do they have credibility? What is their real world experience? Do they strike you as men who have been sucecssful with women, or are they insecure and generally disposed to whining and moaning?
2: The effect of the welfare state, religiosity and female empowerment
A country like Poland has less of a welfare state. 94.3% of the population is considered Christian (and I’d estimate a higher proportion are practicing) vs 59.3 % in the United Kingdom and 71% in the United States.
Feminisim and LGBT is less of a thing in Poland. Overall, it remains more of a traditional, patriarchal society than that in the UK and swathes of the United States.
This certainly will have an influence. People generally and Girls especially are malleable, and respond to incentives. Take away the tempation to become a single mother and pop out children for welfare cheques, introduce a religious upbringing and young women seem less likely to be constantly on the lookout for stimulation, and less prone to monkey branch.
Conclusion : Is Hypergamy Simply Female Nature?
Everyone naturally wants the best genes to be passed on to their children. Everyone (men and women) want the best possible partner to spend their lives with and raise children.
However, I’d say that the rampant, sick Hypergamy does not represent reality. Specifically, I refer to the representation of young women as being wholly self interested, emotionally detached , status seeking, untrustworthy, constantly looking to upgrade, with an insatiable desire for a better man. It’s a skewed narrative, based on the authours prejudice , in turn based on their insecurity about their SMV and lack of real world experience with young attractive women. Fundamentally, it’s a bitter , unrealistic worldview and narrative.
It might be more true in some parts of the world, with a set of conditions that have lead to a degenerative, ever degrading culture that we see in the UK and the USA. But does that mean that it’s in a girls DNA to follow the breed of rampant hypergamny as espoused by red pill thinkers? I’d argue not. To the extent that it is true, it’s based on a slice of the female population that are responding to incentives, such as having access to government resources and thus no longer needing a man that they can keep around for the long term that will help them to raise children.
Putting all of that to one side, the age old wisdom of choosing your partner carefully applies and the facts do not lie : when you adjust for education level, ethniticy, and religiosity, you find that divorce statistics drop dramatically.
So What Can You Do About This?
The first thing you can do is think for yourself. Be sceptical about who you listen to , and question their experience, mindset and worldview. Do they strike you as men who have been at any point successful with women – or is there some bitterness there that is skewing their worldview?
Secondly , test all of this out for yourselves. If you’re not in a relationship and you’re not approaching women (note approaching women – not using Tinder, or online dating sites, where the ratios are all skewed), approaching – then you’re not dealing with reality. You’re more susceptible to black pill and negative thinking.
Thirdly, I have a bunch of resources available, including books, video courses ,free video courses on approaching and attracting women. Infact, most of my time is spent in teaching how you can become more attractive to women. I can tell you that a large part of success is based on your mindset. Even if the species of beastly hypergamy as touted by the red pill guys was true (which it isn’t), it certainly won’t help you when you approach that 24 year old hottie walking around your local supermarket. Seek out information and advice that empowers rather than enervates you.
Become the best man you can be, and you’re much more likley to be susceptible to manosphere garbage, and much more likley to get the results with women that you want.
Hope this helps, and check out the links in the description below for the kind of information that can help you.